Can Talking To Someone Really Help?

Ten-year-old Lisa has been refusing to go to school.  Almost every morning her house is a battle zone with tears and angry words.  Her parents have tried being firm.  They have tried being understanding.  Nothing seems to work.  They keep hoping that Lisa will soon grow out of this perplexing phase.

Susan is a single parent who is feeling frazzled from trying to meet the needs of a stressful full time job and being a full time mother.  She is not sleeping well or eating right.  And she finds herself screaming at the kids for little things.  She keeps saying she needs some time off, but the pressure at work won't allow that.  She feels stuck.

Jack and his wife have been having difficulty with their teenage son for months.  Things got worse when he got his driver's license.  Now he is irritable all the time.  He argues over just about anything: curfew, school, clothes and chores.  His dad knows all teenagers go through a rebellion, but he wonders if it is usually this bad.  And he wonders when it will end.

When we are in the middle of upsetting family situations like these, it is hard to know whether to wait and see if things get better, or whether to get some help.  To help decide you might try asking yourself the following questions:

Is my everyday life being disrupted?

Is the way I feel affecting my sleep, my eating habits, my job or my relationships?

Do I feel stuck, worrying all the time and never finding answers?

If any of these questions sound familiar, or if you find yourself rehashing the same problem over and over while nothing changes, it may be time to talk to someone who can help you find solutions.  Because counseling is not just about talking about problems, it is about change.  It helps you learn more effective ways to deal with the situations in your life.  It can help Susan to manage her roles as employee and mother.  It can educate Jack about normal adolescent behavior and help him regain his authority at home.  And, it can help Lisa and her family, resolve the issues about school.

Nine out of ten Americans surveyed by Consumer Reports said that counseling had helped them.  That is because counseling is a collaborative effort to help you reach the goals you choose.  It can keep problem situations from turning into crises, and can be especially effective if started before a divorce is threatened, a semester is failed or relationships are damaged.  When you talk to a friend, you may feel better for a while, but a counselor is someone who can really help.

© by Mary DuParri, MA, LPC.  I encourage sharing Authentic Living in whole or in part if copyright and attribution are always included.